The world stopped; we scattered, we shattered.

Displaced and confused – here we are. Finding some way to move past an ill rut that lasted longer than any of us could fathom.

Suddenly, we’re 2 years older and a lot grayer.

What really happened? And why are we in what feels like a perpetual daze?

More importantly, how do we snap out of it? How do we get back to what feels good, and normal?

Allow me to shed some light on that – at least from a personal perspective.

There’s always the tendency for a great upset when plans derail or stop altogether. If you’re not a master of flowing with the shift. That is, to be able to adjust and press forward, it’s likely that you’ll get caught in the riptide.

Like surfing, it takes practice. Countless attempts, bumps, and bruises, before you have the experience to ride that wave with confidence. Make no mistake about it, we all start out as amateurs. Afraid, in doubt, and green.

Mastering the ability to flow with change isn’t about perfection as it is about acceptance.

As an introvert with boundaries and inimitable tendencies, I retreated all the way back, and honestly, I didn’t mind it. As a matter of fact, I sort of relished in it.

We experience things differently.

The solitude and what I’ve extracted from it have been the antidote to the clutter that gathers in the corners of my mind. Where anxiety festers and takes on a life of its own. Clutter, if left unchecked for too long, leads to feelings of being stuck, or worse, regression. And I know all too well what happens to my mind, my body, and my whole being once a state of regression takes hold. More than likely, depression follows.

So, what an immersive and invaluable gift it has been to slow the pace. A period to engage and process thoughts. To get as loud or quiet as need be. To dream and get rooted in faith.

Not to say my retreat didn’t come with consequences…

In pulling back, I found myself back under a rock. In a familiar cave of my own creation. Refraining from making contact with friends in fear of social encounters where I would have to explain where I was in my head and heart. Abstaining from family and possible drama where there was likely none to be found. Putting projects on hold without a date to resume.

I retreated in fear.

My confidence was in the dumps and so was my relationship. Passion and fire were words far from reach. I had issues and somehow these issues were too burdensome to rest on someone else’s shoulders. That somehow, those closest to me would not be able to handle it.

In all honesty, I too questioned my desire and willingness to observe or carry their tribulations. In a world where all of us are facing uncertainty and great upset, my grievances weren’t special. To me, they weren’t worth crying to someone else over. And so, I dismissed my needs. My need to connect and be vulnerable.

Throat tightened and teeth gritted, I simply wasn’t in a place to be strong for anyone else but me, and that made me feel ashamed. I’m a huge proponent of putting yourself first, but was I being too selfish with this line of thinking?

In deciding to focus more intentionally and consistently on me, the question, “How long am I going to do this for,” came up; another way, we interrupt the space we give ourselves.

After some trial and error, I realize that the answer to that question is, “However damn long it takes.”

We’re all going to be not okay from time to time. Things won’t always go our way. And we won’t always feel like putting ourselves out there.

And the beauty is, no matter how scary and uncertain, it’ll take however long it takes for you to get back on your feet.

Another thing to remember is, it’s nobody else’s job but your own to make you feel good. Your desire to prioritize yourself, to feel confident, to get your health and fitness in order, etc. comes from within.

You have to see the light and embrace it – when you’re ready.

What if it’s too late?

Well, you don’t get to decide that do you…

Our job is to be here. To do our best. To be our best. In all the little ways.

Where do you find the motivation to commit to RESTARTING your life? How do you access the feeling to take action?


Of course, to etch our way out of any rut, we have to make a decision. Want to lose weight? Decide. Want to buy a house? Decide. Want to take a dream vacation? Decide. Want to be in a loving partnership? Decide. Want to quick smoking? Decide.

Starting with the decision to do something, is the first step.

As for the feeling, that is where it gets trickier. Because, not only do we want the feeling, but we want it to remain. We want that feeling to fuel us consistently, and oftentimes, it doesn’t – at least, not in the beginning.

We have to constantly remind ourselves of our desire to change our current state. And it’ll take giving yourself a regular ‘talking to’ throughout the process. Nourishing your mind to a place where it feels leaner and self-sufficient.

Take Action

And the biggest common denominator here is ACTION. Making one small step in the direction that will see you accomplishing the transformation that you wish to experience.

Save that 20. Call that friend. Buy that workout equipment.

Do one thing, and another, and another...

  1. How would you describe in one word where you are right now? What your outlook is on your life.

  2. What do you do that makes you feel like your best self?

  3. Are you up for taking 1 action/1 step towards the change that you want for yourself?


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♡ Much, much love.


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